Breaking the Narrative on Gender Ideology
And my Interview With Benjamin Boyce
As I was finishing my book I learned that the Center of Bioethics and Culture, whose headquarters was in the North Bay, was having a fundraiser and had invited three notable figures from the gender critical universe to speak at a panel called Breaking the Narrative on Gender Ideology.
There was Amy Sousa whose brilliant analysis of the psychology behind the language of gender ideology had been enormously helpful in getting a grip on why we were being so easily manipulated. She spoke about the importance of embodiment in terms of safeguarding especially in the raising of children and how gender ideology teaches children to discount what their eyes and ears are telling them is reality when we confuse them about who is a man and who is a woman. How the teaching of gender ideology in schools using the gender unicorn teaches children to compartmentalize their feelings which leads to disembodiment which in turn persuades humans to ignore our survival instincts.
Then Chloe Cole, a brave young woman giving testimony at congressional hearings in an attempt to show that gender affirmation care was harming children. Chloe is a biracial tomboy who transitioned between the ages of 12 and 16 because she never felt she would make an adequate woman and thought she was perhaps both male and female. She also sees herself as one of the many on the autism spectrum who were drawn to the idea of transition. She injected testosterone and had a double mastectomy then realized that these treatments did not end her confusion. She is now suing her medical team at Kaiser for not properly informing her of the consequences of having a double mastectomy at the age of 15. She mentioned that she had met another young woman in California who had a similar experience with some of the same doctors and was also suing. During the Q & A she was asked what would help children. She said hobbies. Yes, children need something to occupy themselves rather than making themselves into a project.
Finally there was Benjamin Boyce whom I had followed since 2019 when he interviewed the first young women to desist and realize they were lesbians and not actually men. The panel mediator, Kallie Fell, I had met already at previous events sponsored by the center. She also hosts their podcast Venus Rising.
The evening served to break the narrative by introducing, to the uninitiated, how the gender phenomenon had come about, how it was being pushed in society especially through schools and how to frame it so that we could talk to others about the topic. Themes discussed covered the human need to make meaning, stories of archetypes, how fantasy is the madman’s corner and how a secular society ends up creating a new religion. The panel was recorded and you can enjoy it here.
I was the only guest of the early arrivals who seemed to know the panel members already. Other guests, who paid the $100 ticket to come early, were supporters of the center’s work and one spoke to me of how this gender movement was communist in the sense that its authoritarian nature was paving the way to a cultural shift that was meant to divert society towards more social control by the state. I hadn’t thought of it that way and it occurred to me that this comparison to communism i.e. Marxism was a conservative framing while the Left was perpetually focused on the persecution of minorities being the route to authoritarianism.
I was inclined to agree with her. The Left seemed not to realize that compelled speech and the social punishment of those who resisted this wholesale remaking of language was anathema to democracy. The pursuit of civil rights had certainly seemed to be a righteous goal, but not when it also meant suppressing discussion to determine if gender identity was a civil right or an unhinging from reality. I had already had a taste of such a society as it was very similar to the military regimes of my home country which had in the recent past demanded that all books published be read and approved by the government. With this social justice pressure now at hand our publishing industry has voluntarily censored itself for fear of being seen as bigoted.
The whole point of American democracy, to me, was to maintain freedom of speech by fostering open discussion. Writing my book was, in a sense, my way of testing how much of this freedom of speech we still had. It had not been looking good for any discussion in this arena of gender identity at all. Luckily we had independent media on various platforms, but as we were all learning these too would censor us for unstated reasons under the guise of community standards.
I, too, was operating on such an independent platform as an indie publisher and had worked hard to get my book edited, finished and formatted so I would have proof copies to share with the speakers. The books arrived in the mail three days before the event which felt fortuitous. I introduced myself to the panelists one by one and gave them each a book.
It was a delight to meet all the panelists in such an intimate setting especially Chloe whom I learned was also biracial, like me, with an Asian parent and a Caucasian one. She having a mother who is Filipino and me with my Thai father. We bonded over the dilemma of not belonging anywhere and how that added to our dysphoria. We also shared a love of fashion and designing clothing that served women without being so revealing. As she perused my book she laughed over the chapter headings and we agreed that there was a lot that was funny about this gender phenomenon.
When I showed the book to Benjamin he read the title “The Unexpected Penis” and said “I think I have one of those.” Women usually laugh at the title and some men too, but not as much. Later he would refer to it as my salacious title. It was Benjamin whom I was most able to interest in my story of having been raised in a culture that recognized a “third gender” for people who wanted to present as the opposite sex. How this story was based in the culture’s belief in reincarnation and was geared towards helping those who felt different from the norm become more accepting of their material reality in their current life. Benjamin even mentioned me from the podium in his ten minutes of unscripted thoughts on gender.
He later posted the ten minute clip to his site. His comments on the human need for mythology, initiation and storytelling to inform each generation about gender takes the conversation deeper and introduces what we gender critical voices have avoided discussing—that we need social instruction in how the sexes occupy their sex. His thoughts prompt me to wonder if we should at least offer our young an idea of how men and women conduct themselves in civilized society as a model. It would certainly be an improvement over directing children to subvert the heteronormative paradigm before they even know what that is. American culture is fond of asking each generation to reinvent itself, but at what point does this process become a self-destructive impulse? Why reinvent the wheel, when there are more interesting and important skills to learn? We need resilient people not more self involved people to handle the increasingly dire problems of encroaching resource depletion and climate challenges. Such “re-skilling” had been my subject until I realized that this discussion of gender was one big mindfuck that had possibly been deployed as a social diversion while capitalist forces continued to find ways fleece us in this march towards collapse.
A few weeks after the panel Benjamin contacted me for an interview and we recorded just after the July 4th holiday. It's a long interview, starting with where I live and what I do as a professional organizer. Benjamin was so interested in Thailand, that he asked me a lot about Thai history going back to World War II. How my parents met and what kind of society I lived in. I did my best to reach back across the ocean as I gathered my thoughts on what I know of my country.
In my youth the Vietnam war was still much in people’s minds and I often found myself having to answer their questions about Thailand and the supposed domino theory that assumed Thailand would also fall to communism. I was curious myself why there even was a war in Vietnam so had spent a fair amount of time reading everything I could find about Thai history since World War II, the Japanese occupation, the sex trade and the infamous Gulf Of Tonkin incident that set off the American involvement in Vietnam.
We don't get to gender and back to the United States until 40 minutes in where I could give voice to how gender non-conforming children have always been with us. It is the narrative we hang on this presentation that gets us into trouble. I'm also grateful that Benjamin allowed me to talk about my intentions about the book in the final fifteen minutes. A Benjamin Boyce interview is a terrific gateway into the gender critical universe so it was a lucky first interview to introduce me to the gender critical universe.
I was pleased to hear feedback that is was a captivating interview and that I came across as thoughtful and intelligent.
My book The Unexpected Penis: Conversations on the Gender Trail is available in both ebook and paperback. https://a.co/d/5utS1s4
That was a truly interesting and fascinating interview. Thank you Benjamin and Amanda.